Haiku to a Bad Consultant
Drops in from above.
Squawks, craps, confusion, panic.
Offers no answer.
(Sends me a bill…)
I wrote this during an actual conference call with one of the many digital marketing experts in my life. What shocked me was how useless this person’s expertise was, because it wasn’t focused on actually improving my firm’s situation.
It was just a lot of sound, based on speculation, emotion, and technical vagaries. Rather than leading to clarity and decision, it propagated fear and insulated the consultant from responsibility for any resulting decision path.
There are two lessons I’ve learned in the world of management consulting that would help this person:
- In the often intangible world of technology, there’s a huge premium for clarity.
Especially in the face of uncertainty. - Having an opinion that doesn’t lead to a recommendation is as good as being home sick.
Except, when you’re home sick, there’s a chance something will improve. Consulting advice that doesn’t lead to action is like expensive squawking from a seagull.
Good consulting is analysis, mitigation, and managing against unknowns. The financial and reputation risks are higher in most jobs, but so are the rewards and variety of work. But it’s a poor career path for a seagull.
Those who habitually squawk and flap around during uncertainty end up being shooed away.
So don’t be a seagull, okay?
The future of digital experiences will be built by strategists who grasp the full array of emerging business, social, and technical models. Specialties in user experience, branding, application design, and data science are laying the foundation for richer user experiences and business models breakthrough products and revenue based marketing.
1 Response to "Haiku to a Bad Consultant"
November 24, 2010
Hahaha – classic! Not quite sure I get the ‘home sick’ part though. But your post reminded me of something else I saw recently (pardon the French on the site): http://www.whatthefuckismysocialmediastrategy.com/
You might as well just click on this site for hours instead of paying for your seagull!